November 13, 2012

Marykate Olsen Is Dating My Grandpa

USA Today -->
Mary-Kate Olsen, 26, and her sweetie, Olivier Sarkozy, 42, half-brother of the former president of France, are still hot and heavy, as you can see. The two, who have been dating for six months or so, were spotted in this (uncomfortable?) smooch pose on Friday night while cheering on the New York Knicks at Madison Square Garden in New York City. The WSJ Magazine asked Mary-Kate about the romance — and the 16-year age difference — in a recent interview. The star/designer's reply: "Everyone has an opinion. I find it's better to focus on what's in front of you and to keep putting one foot in front of the other."

Is anybody else thinking what I am? Marykate Olsen doesn't look half as bad as I thought she would. I mean her and her twin sister Ashley just disappeared off face off the earth for like 7 years right? But here she comes, looking pretty smoking at this Knicks-Mavs game while some 70-year-old licks the side of her face. Her mind is telling the press that she likes this guy, but her face looks like she's being held captive by this psycho. If that is not the face of pure terror right there, I don't know what is.

What's up with chicks being in to older guys anyways? Like I remember when I was in high school and all the girls in our grade would go hang out with kids older than us that could drive and shit. Me and my buddies were riding around on our huffy bikes with pegs, and stolen chromies on the tires while the Senior quarterback was getting road dome in his Ford Explorer. But I feel like women have taken it to a whole new level. Instead of just looking in the grade above them, women have began searching places where old people hang out. Like; banks, whole food stores, retirement homes, bingo halls, and Jimmy Buffet concerts. Open your eyes ladies! Yeah these guys might have money, stability, houses, and time shares or shit like that. Us young bloods have cool shit too, We are technologically savy, we have knees that work, and balls that don't sag to our knees! Please ladies, don't be a part of the problem anymore. Out with the old, and in with new!

P.S. Marykate Olsen.... My team. Bold move, but I'm sticking with my gut.

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